Today as I was going through some of my junk in preparation for yet another move I came across the calendar from when I moved to Colorado in 2007. When I flipped through it I realized that I have officially been away from Louisiana for 4 years (and a day) now. Of course this reminded me of a BNL song from their album All In Good Time: I've been away 4 years and a day. You'd be thinking I'd be lonely, but I'm out here to stay. I wouldn't have it any other way!
I thought about leaving this area, but there are other things at work here. I feel like I have a purpose in staying here and especially in moving into Castle Rock even if I don't currently have a job. I'm still looking for gainful employment and doing my best to de-clutter my life. It's a bit of a process but I'm making some progress. I can hardly wait for the end result!
I have been told since my last post that I was too cryptic about what I really am doing. Therefore let me take the opportunity to clarify a little and add to what was previously said. I am staying in the Denver Metro area in the southern suburbs. I have found a nice one bedroom apartment in the Castle Pines area. When I went looking for a new place to live I felt drawn to the Castle Rock area for some reason and settled on the place I found in Castle Pines. The really interesting thing is I originally felt good about this area because it would still be with in the boundaries of the Crowfoot Ward where I have been going to church for the past 4 years. But as I said in my last post, change happens...
A little over a week ago it was announced that Crowfoot would be getting a new bishop. I was sad but understood well the need for change and that it was a good time to call a new leader for the ward. Knowing that the change in bishop would come the first Sunday in June I took the opportunity this past weekend to make a quick trip over to Utah to see my family (including my aging cat). I drove over Friday night with my little sister arriving at the parenets' house around 3AM. The visit was nice but I was missing my friends back in Colorado. I wanted to be kept informed about the last Sunday with Bishop Calvert so I had Kim text me updates (she said nothing amazing would happen). Well, it turns out it's been decided that it is time for a split in the Crowfoot Ward. I wondered if this would happen since the Parker Stake split back in March and Crowfoot was covering 3 stakes (Parker, Parker South, and Castle Rock). The split will happen this next Sunday in conjunction with the change in ward leadership. Parker and Parker South will keep Crowfoot and Castle Rock will get it's own Young Single Adult Branch (a branch is like a smaller version of a ward). So, even though I decided on my new place partly because it would keep me in Crowfoot that is no longer the case. I returned to Colorado on Monday knowing that I will be moving into the boundaries of the Castle Rock Stake once again and therefore will be a part of this new branch. This will be my last week in Crowfoot, but I will be in good company even though we will be few in number in the beginning. I do not know everyone that will be in the new branch but I do know I will be surrounded by several of my friends (Kim, Barbie, Crystal, Jenny, Danny, Ryan, Jason, Jared -- look ma, I named guys too!).
To all my friends who will remain in Crowfoot, I will miss seeing ya'll every Sunday. I tried to stay in the ward but I think someone else had other plans for me. We will still have opportunities to hang out and you will have to come see my new place once I'm moved in.
I am excited to be a part of the creation of a new YSA Branch for the church. That is something I have never been privileged to be a part of before. I have said several times in the past that I know that I was led to move to this part of the Denver area but could never really say why. It's at this time that I look to the wonderful example of Esther: "And who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" (Esther 4:14) Change has come and I plan to embrace it!
Well folks, I guess I've held off long enough from telling the blogosphere what comes next for me. After being unhappy with my job at dish network for seven months I am quitting. This was not as easy a decision as I would have liked since I do not currently have anything else lined up by way of employment. This week is my last week of having to go to a place that was a decent job and source of income at a time when I needed it but also a place that I dreaded going to everyday. I was never happy working there. I only felt like I could make it through each day after I gave my supervisor my notice to leave the company. I am grateful for the friends I made while working there - especially my friend Kim who has continued to give me strength even after she left the company back in February. (We still see each other at church but it was at dish where we first became friends).
In addition to me leaving my job I will be moving. The question remains as to where. When I initially decided to quit my job I thought about moving in with my grandmother in Broomfield for a while. This is still an option, but as the time has gotten closer to the end of my current lease I have once again felt that it is not yet time for me to leave the Parker/Castle Rock area. I know there are plenty of people that will be frustrated with me (I'm sorry to my family who has had to endure my flip-flopping back and forth). I have considered going elsewhere in the last few months more than I have in a long time. I know I could succeed where ever I go in anything I do, but for me at this time in my life it comes down to what I feel is right for me. I am someone that feels the need for guidance and inspiration from my Father in Heaven. That inspiration has not been as clear recently as I would like it to be but I can still make choices in the way I should go. I know that I was inspired to come to Denver 4 years ago for school. At that time I could have moved anywhere in the Denver Metro area, but I was lead to find housing in the Parker/Castle Rock area. This simple decision has lead to some of the best times in my life and making some of the best friends I have ever had. I know I could meet new people elsewhere because of how much I have grown here. But there is still something I am missing. Though I cannot explain what it is I know there is something for me that I still need to learn and/or find.
Change happens - that I know and have come to accept. Change will happen whether I leave or stay, but if you have something really good in your life that can lead you to something even better then why would you ever let that go??? Why should I move away from the amazing friends I have made in my ward? Why would I leave such an amazing place where I still have something left for me even though I don't know what that is? So, to any of my Crowfoot friends who might actually read this little rambling of mine, I am doing everything I can to stay within the ward boundaries for the foreseeable future. To those who thought I was leaving, this is coming as a little bit of a surprise to me too. I do not know where I will live. I have to search for an affordable apartment where I can move to by the end of June. I have to pack up my life again no matter what I do, but I am ready to be on my own once again. I am stronger than I was the last time I lived alone. I can be happy on my own (though someday I hope to have someone with whom I can share my life).
So bring on this last week at this job! Bring on the next stage of life! Bring on the change and I will show you what I can make of it!!!
This weekend I had the amazing opportunity to go to San Antonio, TX for a Time Out with Katie and our friend Kris. I've enjoyed being in the south again and seeing the beautiful missions of San Antonio. I now have plenty to think about as I Choose to Become. Hopefully what I learned here this weekend will help me on my journey.
