That's Life

Lately, when people have asked me how I'm doing I haven't really known how to respond. Yeah, things aren't great for me right now. I'm not where I hoped I'd be by this point in my life. Things could be much better than they are, but that's life.

(Don't let it get you, don't let it get you down
For this world keeps on spinning 'round)

That's life
That's what all the people say
You're riding high in April
You're shot down in May
I know I'm gonna change that tune
When I'm back on top in June

I say that's life
And as funny as it may seem
Some people get their kicks
Stompin' on your dreams
But I don't let it, let it get me down
'Cause this fine ol' world keeps spinning 'round

I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate,
A poet, a pawn and a king
I've been up and down and over and out
But I know one thing
Each time I find myself, flat on this face
I pick myself up and get back in the race

That's life
I can't deny it
I thought of quitting, baby
This heart wasn't gonna buy it
And if I didn't think it was worth one single try
I'd jump right on a big bird and then I'd fly

I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate,
A poet, a pawn and a king
I've been up and down and over and out
And I know one thing
Each time I find myself flat on my face
I pick myself up and get back in the race
That's life
That's life and I can't deny it
Many times I thought of cutting out
But my heart won't buy it
But if there's nothing shakin' come this here July
I'm gonna roll
I'm gonna roll
I'm gonna roll myself up in a big ball and die
Can't deny it
That's life

Goodbye, February! You have been a fickle friend bringing me happiness and heartache - sadly more of the latter than the former.

I hope and pray that March brings me many good things and few, if any, bad. It's been good to me in the past and there are a couple of things I'm looking forward to at the end of the month - Buble and BNL!!!
Please don't let me down!

WHO DAT!

In case you don't know, I am a Saints fan! I normally could care less about the Super Bowl and usually don't even know who's playing. But get the Saints in the game and I'm all over it! Now, don't misjudge me by anymeans. I have never skipped church for football and today was no exception. I went to church - got there early in fact - and I stayed the entire time! The great thing about it all was that I was able to stay for all of church, leave as soon as it was over, and still make it home in time for the coin toss. I invited people over, but only one person came other than my room mate, Jessica. Am I upset that people didn't come? NO! The Saints were so awesome that I was jumping for joy and probably would have stepped on someone. Plus, I didn't have to put up with people cheering for the other team in my home. I'm glad I was able to watch the game. I'm glad the Saints proved the doubters wrong. And I'm glad to be a part of the Who Dat Nation!

Saints 31 Colts 17, Drew Brees MVP, First Super Bowl appearance in franchise history, First Super Bowl win! Laissez les bon temps rouler!!!

Think Too Much

I've been thinking quite a bit lately, more than I normally would seeing as I'm not in school anymore. I try to stop my self from thinking too much, but that's almost like trying not to breathe more than once an hour. I sit still and my brain keeps going. The only trouble is my thoughts only lead to more confusion. I think about the things I've done thus far in my life only to wonder why I worked so hard and have very little to show for it. I think about the things I've studied only to wonder why I can't remember more. I think about my parents only to wonder why I don't seem as important to them as my siblings. I think about my siblings only to wonder why I am the anomaly among them. I think about my friends only to wonder why I am so often left out when they "want to hang out with me". I think about the guys I've liked over time only to wonder why I was nothing more than a sister or a "great friend". I think about the guys I currently have interest in only to wonder if it's even worth it to bother. I think about my faith only to wonder why it so often seems in vain. I think about my future only to wonder if I'm heading in the right direction.

There is a song that I've been listening to that seems to fit this thinking perfectly. It is from the musical Wicked and is entitled "I'm Not That Girl"

Hands touch, eyes meet
Sudden silence, sudden heat
Hearts leap in a giddy whirl
He could be that boy
But I'm not that girl:

Don't dream too far
Don't lose sight of who you are
Don't remember that rush of joy
He could be that boy
I'm not that girl

Ev'ry so often we long to steal
To the land of what-might-have-been
But that doesn't soften the ache we feel
When reality sets back in

Blithe smile, lithe limb
She who's winsome, she wins him
Gold hair with a gentle curl
That's the girl he chose
And Heaven knows
I'm not that girl:

Don't wish, don't start
Wishing only wounds the heart
I wasn't born for the rose and the pearl
There's a girl I know
He loves her so
I'm not that girl

(I've added emphasis to the parts I feel apply to me.)

My mom got me this soundtrack for Christmas because ever since we went to see the show back in November she see's me as Elphaba. In many ways I am like Elphaba, but she gets the guy in the end where as I just get shafted everytime. That's why I can't even let myself start wishing anymore... my heart can't take the hurt.

I have now exposed myself more than I ever intended to do in this little blog of mine, but I suppose it's because I know how few people will actually read this. Most of my friends and family don't even know I have a blog. The ones who do know most likely only check it once in a blue moon because I, as a single female, have nothing of interest of which to share - no children, no real job, no more schooling, no touching stories about a significant other.

So, here's to too much thinking and a life of mediocre solitude.

So This Is The New Year...

Ringing in 2010

2009 - The End of Another Year

Well folks, it's the end of yet another year. This year had many ups and downs as is normal in life. The biggest upside about this year for me was finishing my Master's Degree in Library and Information Science. The biggest downside was not being able to find a full time job after graduation due to the sucky economy (and not likely to find anything decent any time soon).

So, now that it's almost the new year you might be wondering what I have to look forward to? Well, I'll tell you. For the first time in my life I have absolutely NOTHING to look forward to - no schooling, no job prospects, no love interest (that's par for the corse though). Hopefully all ya'll have at least a little something to plan for in this coming year, but as for me it will just be another year in which I try to stay sane as I go about my life from day to day.

Happy New Year!